Apathy

Hello, my dear friend,

Today is 30th of April. I am sitting in airport and waiting for my flight. Today I come back to Italy. May someone would be happy… But I feel only apathy. Yes, I have a bipolar disorder. It is normal. Today I feel nothing. I want to sit, to drink black coffee, to smoke and to do nothing. I should change my mind, but I like it. I like to feel nothing. It does not hurt. I like, when materialism does not matter for me. Life is easier. I like, when people’s words are not important for me. I can live with my own mind. Today I am without feelings. I am crying somewhere in my heart, but even this does not have meaning for me. Yes… Today I am broken.

My dear friend, it is not normal.

But it is normal for me.

My dear friend, I am not sure, why I am writing it here.

I want to remember. Or to forget? I do not know. As I have said, today I want nothing.

I do not want to eat, to sleep, to meet with people. Only to sit and to think.

About what am I thinking without feelings? About everything. Because now feelings do not disturb to me.

My dear friend, sorry for this boring post.

I hope, you are doing well.

With love,

Yours Rya

Advertisements

8 thoughts on “Apathy”

  1. Have a safe flight and hope you will feel better soon.
    Will pray for you.
    Thanks for sharing your heart with us.
    Take care

    Would love if you will check out our website and share your thoughts.
    Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. my dog just puked and I’m very sad. someone might be leaving poisons dog treats and toys at the local dog park. Please pray for her. She bit my dad hard. She never bits!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.